"Gather ye rose-buds while ye may." Robert Herrick

"Gather ye rose-buds while ye may." Robert Herrick

Hello Friends!

Friends, Romans, countrymen...y'all. Foodies, gardeners, artists and collectors - let's gather together to share and possibly learn a thing or two in the mix.

Donna Baker

Wednesday, January 2, 2019

Out With The Old

Just thinking.  Out with the old - in with the new.

I usually make new years' resolutions.  I am about 50% with keeping them, so I figure I should go ahead and give it a try. 

This year my resolution is Get Her Done.

As I get older, I am feeling the lack of time left to get things done.  It is rather distressing, but also a challenge.  Oh, and I usually get a head start before the beginning of the new year.  Maybe superstition, perhaps just nothing more than an early start.

Had a few talks with a family member.  Put off for far too long.  In my later years, I try not to give advice or maybe it is just to mind my own business; avoid conflict at all costs.  That is how I roll. When it affects family, it is especially hard, but I finally did it.  It did not go as I had hoped.  Does it ever?  I may have given up on wishes and dreams coming true, but not hope. Can't change the past, but the future, yes.  That is what I ended the discussion with.  My life's work has been my family. My kids don't know what not having a family is like. They also think they know it all - that parents lived in another time.  Experience mentioned is taken as an insult.  Well, how do you know how it feels to be old when you've never been old?  How does it feel to be a parent when you've never been one?  I can only hope I planted a seed.

On another front, there is a passage in the Christian bible, in the book of Matthew I believe, "all is vanity and that is like chasing the wind".  I was brought up in the church, but am no longer religious, at the least don't believe in a mono-theist religion.  I do remember some of the readings though.  

I haven't been very vain in later years.  Hate wearing makeup and jewelry; just not a very girly girl.  Why should we have to wear make-up when men don't?  Mostly.  I can't stand to put on all the products either.  Scrubbing, toning, on an on.  

Well, guess what?  I've suddenly begun to see things heading south and wrinkles.  I just turned another year older and it struck me like a thunderbolt.  So, I am researching all the new procedures, short of surgery.  I cannot believe all the things they are doing now. BTW, I do draw the line at vaginal rejuvenation and hand fillers. 

Just thinking... 


Curtains in My Tree said...

Oh My gosh you sound like every other gal I know our age with grown children that thinks our generation is off the path of realities LOL
No advice for sure from any of my kids, they are all smarter than MR (they think) LOL

I don't understand why when our kids get grown and leave home, they turn into people we don't even know or can relate to?
I finally accepted I had 3 sweet babies and they have gone to never never land.LOL

I wear makeup daily can't even go to grocery with out lipstick LOL (vane)

Hang in there gal you aren't all alone


Out on the prairie said...

Like the get er done, a old boss always sent out the crew with that

Anonymous said...

All true Janice. They really don't need me anymore except to babysit or give money. They are too busy now and I just have to face the facts. Try talking to my baby boy with a new Ph.D. in psychology. I do love them so as parents do. Unconditional love. It is still a learning process even at my age. I wouldn't want it any other way. Except for the wrinkles. I go tomorrow for botox and fillers. Laser for veins on face after that. Then I'll see about the next things. My turkey neck is bothering me. Yes, I am going to chase that wind.

Anonymous said...

I wish I had a crew, at least an assistant. Let's hope for a great 2019.

Bea said...

I would chase the wind, too. I think. May the procedures go well, Donna.

Having not had kids, I can't imagine what it must be like to have children transition into adulthood and not need me like they once did. As an adult child, of course, I can see how the relationship with my own parents changed over time. I am also a child of divorce, so there are some old wounds that still sometimes flare up, but I try to keep a level head.

Happy New Year to you. x

Elephant's Child said...

No resolutions here. I fail at enough things already without setting myself up for more.
I have earned my grey hair and my wrinkles and am (mostly) comfortable with them.
Good luck with your procedures.
And a huge sigh at your experience being devalued.

Tom Stephenson said...

I draw the line at vaginal rejuvenation as well.

La Table De Nana said...

No resolutions for me.
I never do..
I just do:)..
I guess I could say don't have a glass or two of red wine every night while making dinner..but I won't.;)

So my husband... older and wiser warned me to never give advice re the way our children raise their children..and because I don't have a family..only the one I have apart from one brother..I took heed.I just can't risk that.
Plus I think the few times I have actually said something direct..it's me that has felt bad.
I would not want to turn them against me..
Nothing is pressing and so far so good:) Thank God.

I am a touch girlie girl..no surprises here:)I gave birth w/ mascara:)

As for fillers and botox whatever floats your boat and makes you happy:)♥

A cute young instagrammer I follow..who must have a million followers..always says:"You do you"~

I like that.

As for church etc..
I have faith:)♥
But I am catholic and married a divorcé 45 yrs ago.
Need I say more?
No church wedding for this 20 yr old:(

I did baptize the girls..first communions..went to church..stopped when I saw their interest waning..
went back yrs later.
Stopped again.
I pray in my heart.
You be you:)

Michelle said...

No resolutions here and likely no "body modifications" either. Though, things have started heading south. I am who I am.

oldgreymareprimitives said...

Happy New Year. I love faces with character. I had better as mine is gaining character daily. Once again I am ever so thankful for the strong and healthy relationship that I have with my kids. It took work and I am always checking myself to be sure I am lovingly counseling and not lecturing; a loooong work in progress. Early 20's were tough but smooth sailing these days. thank heaven as I will need them some day and they still want me. lol

Joanne Noragon said...

OK, Donna, it is a comfort to come here and read other people's children are my children.
I never wore makeup, not even lipstick. I was not a purist hippie; I just could not abide the feel of it.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Bea. It is tough to grow up - I have only recently gotten past the I'm not sure what I want to be when I grow up! I thought I was supposed to be heading into the golden years. Still waiting for those.

Anonymous said...

They are great kids/adults and wouldn't agree with my view. Just sayin... I do love my littles though. I just like that I am able to send them back home. Been there done that.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear Monique, how did you get so wise? I concur with Jacque. I don't want my daughter-in-law or son-in-law to not like me. I'm very careful with what I say to them. Sometimes I have no filter and have to bite my tongue. It usually works, but yes, I am usually the one that feels bad...

Anonymous said...

Check back in about 20 years. My sister has had nearly every plastic surgery you can get and twice. I never thought I would either and then the day came out of the blue.

Anonymous said...

Duly noted Suzan. I wish I were more like my sister. She gets right in the middle of everything and her two kids call here every day. I on the other hand don't get involved and ...

Anonymous said...

I think it is the norm for adult kids to think they know it all. I do blow dry my hair, but usually pile it on top of my head in a clip. Can you imagine all of the heated tools and hair extensions etc.? I can get ready to leave the house in five minutes.

Anonymous said...

You cracked me up Tom. FYI, there are 5 different procedures down there that sound very painful.

ellen abbott said...

or the smell. made me sneeze and my eyes water.

ellen abbott said...

I quit wearing makeup at 19 or 20 for that very reason. men ate attractive as is but women have to paint their faces to be attractive. fuck that. I didn't age for the longest time but then it descended on me over the course of a year. well, this is who I am, I have lived long enough to get wrinkles and these are the lines of my story. I can't imagine letting someone inject some substance in my face.

my last new year's resolution was years ago. 5 sun salutations a day. I just renew it every year. some years I'm more successful than others. happy new year.

Anonymous said...

Same here Ellen. It has just started out of the blue and it is shocking to see jowls forming and wrinkles too. I'm not against doing anything to put off the inevitable. Smoker's lips? Uggg. I didn't smoke, but they say if you have always used straws in your drinks they form. I just noticed several lines and I want them gone. We'll see. I already cancelled my appt. for today as it is icy out and I need more time to think about it. I also am not willing to spend a fortune on it, so can't afford all I want done. I hope your year is wonderful. I am ready for spring.

Share my Garden said...

I have learnt (the hard way and painfully and slowly) not to give my daughters advice.The trouble is that they know what I'm thinking without my having to open my mouth!
On the subject of looks, the thought of procedures fills me with horror. Have the face of a life well lived and laugh and smile a lot is my approach. I think its far more important to do everything we can to be healthy and if we do so we should look fine. Many women in Britain wear so much makeup these days that their faces resemble masks. I think that character is more beautiful than just a flawless skin.

Anonymous said...

Rosemary, it is tricky. It bothered me for years and I hoped I could put a stop to it, but no such luck. Maybe the two kids will find their way back to each other some day. I thought the same as you about procedures, then out of the blue I changed. Wasn't expecting it. Now, I'm all in. I do draw the line at hollywood lips and Brazilian butt lifts. But lifting and filling in wrinkles are on my list. Just want to make sure I go to someone who knows what they are doing. And, I am starting to save my money. I think the costs are the worst part. I'm not going gently...